Head VS Heart: You

"How amazing is Lucas?"

"How did you guys meet?"

"How did he ask you out?"

"How did he ask you to be his gf?"

"What is your first impression of him?"

"Describe lucdx in one word"

"Why Lucas?"

The questions baffle me sometimes hahahahaha. Some of you may go "huh???!?!" but each time when faced with questions like any one of these, I see myself scrutinizing my vocabulary bank in dire need of finding a word that would easily describe or answer them. I'm far from those talented poetic girls who are able to put their convoluting thoughts easily into words and often enough I find myself wishing "if only I could be just like one of them." No, I didn't mean for any negativity here at all. Sure— Lucas is an amazing guy but I don't want people to see him as just that "amazing" guy merely bounded by an adjective. Lovely, that's just another one. Gentlemanly, and that's another one. It's unfair to him isn't it, there isn't any word that I know of that could pack a myriad of definitions into a word that describes him. Each word consist of a set of parallel rigid walls that prevents one definition from intersecting one another; and the reason why I never got to answering these questions is because, I want to answer them the way he deserves to get, and not be confined to the word limit on askfm, not meant as a boast but rather, I want the world to see how proud I am to be with him, how thankful I am for him and the fact that he has been nothing short of making me feel like a queen every single day undeserving or not. (hehe) :-))

And I don’t know if these words could ever profess my everything to you!!??!!!

I love how you're always reminding me in your own silly witty ways how boootyful (beautiful) I am. Even at my peakest when I would whine over my stupid obsession over my weight gain, you never fall short in trying to make me feel better despite me telling you off that your view is just biased etc. You're always there for me through thick and thin (hwah since 3 years ago is it considered ahahaha), through all the times I break down and was on the verge of giving up in my different aspects of life.

I love how you take really long to respond to something that just happened; like how you like me surprising you at your place early in the morning so that you'll wake up to finding me sitted at your living room, few weeks later and how you refuse to thank me for your bday wish from the anonymous me on askfm until a week later heh. You're a person that's really really bad at cards (curry stain all siaaaaalll) but your words mean the most to me. It's been 3 spendid months; and I loved it all.

I love how you disturb the fact that I sleep so much during the day that I'm practically a nocturnal at night. All my retarded "it's just another 5 minutes" could drag to 2 hours even until you were back from the gym my incoherency and disbelief that I exclaimed thru "did you even go to the gym just now???" when I woke up because time spent with you passes by so quickly; it never seemed like it was just months that we've been together.

I love you for your annoyingly cute lame 5 year old behaviours and your lauya non-visual memory. I do hate being the only one that remembers our minor stupid moments and ended up bursting into laughter on my own, and it is weird how you (or we) stick our tongues out randomly or cringe our noses 24/7 especially after each time we kiss. I know you hate being portrayed as mellow but, just this once let me!!!! But it's amazing how you choose to remember the lovely minute visual details, it's the smallest things you pay attention to.

I will always love you for your flaws, your little imperfections (KT?? Hehe), and the dreams we aspired to achieve aft JC. I love you for your frustrations over my complains of my weight gain and the dilemma you faced each time because you want me to truly enjoy the little things in life and that is food yet at the same time want me to be happy. Not forgetting our random disagreements that appear out of nowhere sometimes.

Come 10 years down the road I hope our plans will work out to what we once talked about: gap years work student loans renting an apartment in uk studying in ucl/king's college you working your way to become a professor me (still in the midst of figuring what I want to do when I grow up) It may seem like I'm merely building sandcastles in the air and living in my own little bubble but hey this is gonna be my motivation..!!!!!

Every flaw, every single one of it, every part of you - I lav them (hehe). Words can never connote fully how much you mean to be but yeah I'll continue to love you every single day. :-)

(I meant to upload a few recent pictures of us but bless my soul my iphotos crashed with my iphone connected and i lost all 7000 photos in my camera roll; every.single.one.of.them ooooh the irony when i'm wearing a four-leaved clover necklace.......... sigh so the only photo I have of us now is the one above because I drafted this since last week)

Just realized I'm so long winded and naggy HA HAH ha ha Ha HAAA *snorts*

Uh ooookie and the thing is how we met is pretty hard to explain we first met at this house party in September of both our j1 year? That's almost 3 years ago! And yep I never knew he ec-ed me back that since school started.... (Which explains the spams he DM-ed the student council's twitter voting me for prom queen.......DAMN QT) Gotta thank Jess for asking me along haha ^_^

We don't have any love story of how we met and all anyway hahaha. That's a damn ugly photo but whatevs ahaha I remember I spent half the time during the party cleaning/wiping the floor that had alcohol spilled all over in that state of mind... And the thing is I even dragged Jess to clean it up with me HAHAHA wtf ok sorry for the digression.

Yeah we were just acquaintances then? But we do talk a little here on twitter and shit since I'm attached then HAHAHA then only this year we started talking during the cny period? (Note: I'm single then already) When Aloy asked me over to his place to gamble then Lucas came over last minute cuz he was near Aloy's house too Lady Luck was on my side it was my first time gambling I was winning and I even helped him recoup back his losses?! Idk I figured when I'm happy I'm lucky HAHAHA but yeah I really had a great night w them until 4am ish? Then another round at Kaiyuan's place a few days later too but that night was just meh not lucky at all.. Then we started studying tgt and all? And i'll study till he finishes his rugby training!

Things initially wasn't easy for the both of us I must say. There were many external factors that I was so upset about each time till the extent Jess say I place my happiness so easily on things that when something happens, my mood changes with it. I'm gna skip this part but yep eventually they worked out I guess in life you just need to take a leap of faith haha :-) so yeah if any of you guys out there ask what to do etc if you ec a guy or likes him but don't know if you should follow them on social media or anything, just YOLO and go for it!!!!

Here's to many more months and years ahead of us!!!!!!!!!!! And uhm yeah and to filling the remaining now 28GB memory of my phone with (your) our faces ^_^ Soi Cowboy awaitsss in 3 days :-))))